A Countdown To FanFiction
by Carbuncle
Summary: I poke fun at my own fanfiction, and reveal why every story starts with 'A Countdown To...'


FINAL FANTASY VII  
  
'A Countdown To FanFiction'  
  
"See you guys later! I'm going out! Don't wait up!", yelled Yuffie.  
  
"Wait, wait, wait!", groaned Tifa. "Where do you think you're going?"  
  
"...I'm going to the library. Have you got a problem with that?", Yuffie smirked.  
  
"N-No... Go right ahead.", slurred Tifa.  
  
Yuffie had been visiting the library a lot lately. She had managed to keep it a secret from the party, but all secrets must eventually come out.  
  
"There's no need to look at me like that.", Yuffie coughed before walking out the door of Seventh Heaven.  
  
She wandered through the Slums, until she made it to Midgar Public Library. She crept inside and sat down at one of the internet ready computers.  
  
"Okay!", she smiled as she began typing. "www.fanfiction.net! Haha! Lets see... Grrr! I got no new reviews for my latest story! Dammit!"  
  
"Shhh!", whispered a nearby librarian.  
  
"Sorry!", Yuffie replied. "Oh well, I hate not gettin' new reviews, but it can't be helped I suppose. I know, I'll write another story to add to my collection!"  
  
"Aha! Tifa told us you'd be here!", shouted a familiar voice.  
  
Yuffie turned around to see Cloud, Barrett, Tifa, Aeris and Red XIII standing behind her.  
  
"What the hell do you folks want?!", Yuffie growled. "Can't you see I'm busy?!"  
  
"So, this is what you've been doin' these past few weeks... Writing stories...", said Barrett.  
  
"I never figured you were the creative type Yuffie.", thought Cloud.  
  
"FanFiction.Net? What is that?", asked Red XIII.  
  
"It's a website that allows people like me to unleash our imagination and free our soul."  
  
"May we read one of your stories?", Red XIII questioned her.  
  
"Oh, okay if you must!", sighed Yuffie. "But try not to laugh too hard!"  
  
"Oh, that is a bold claim to make!", Cloud flinched. "Alright... Uh, Yuffie, all these stories are the same."  
  
"Huh?! No they're not!"  
  
"Well, why the heck do they all start with 'A Countdown To...'?!"  
  
"Um, I can explain that. You remember that TV show 'Friends'?"  
  
The party stare blankly.  
  
"Nevermind. But every episode of that show starts with 'The One With...', so I basically wanted to poke fun at those titles."  
  
"Oh, so *thats* why!", laughed Aeris.  
  
"Yeah, now are you gonna read one or not?!", she snapped. "I suggest reading 'A Countdown To Trouble', which some people consider one of my best!"  
  
The party began to read Yuffie's story...  
  
"Wait-a-minute! These are about us!", shrieked Tifa.  
  
"No, they're not!", Yuffie retorted.  
  
"Of course they are! The characters here have the same names as we do!"  
  
"W-Why did you kill me off in this fic, Yuffie? D-Don't you like me?", Aeris sniffed.  
  
"Sure I like you, but..."  
  
Suddenly, a huge bookcase fell over and crushed the poor ancient to death. A huge pool of red blood squirted out from underneath.  
  
"Oh my God! They killed Aeris!", screamed Tifa.  
  
"You beasts!", yelled Cloud.  
  
"Hehe! Now I have a new idea for a fic! Heh, I was suffering from writers block, y'know?!", Yuffie began typing on the computer once more. "There, now all I need is a title..."  
  
"I jus' don't get this whole fanfiction thing!", gurgled Barrett. "I'm goin' home. You comin' Red?"  
  
"Yes. I shall see you later Yuffie."  
  
Barrett and Red XIII left the library, while Cloud and Tifa remained glued to the screen next to Yuffie.  
  
"You two still here?", mumbled Yuffie.  
  
"Why don't you invent a new character for your stories, Yuffie? I don't think I'm too comfortable with you using us as your principal characters.", suggested Tifa.  
  
"Nah! People don't like original characters. They find it too hard to identify with them so its best to leave them out.", Yuffied explained.  
  
"Excuse me, but do any of you guys know where I can find the gory books about war?"  
  
Cloud and Tifa turned around to see their old friend Chris pacing the floor.  
  
"Uh, sure. They're over there near the childrens books.", Cloud said helpfully.  
  
"Gee, thanks!", bloated Chris.  
  
"Okay, I'm gonna upload my new story and then we can go home.", Yuffie clicked on the mouse a few times before signing off. "There! All done!"  
  
Cloud, Tifa and Yuffie began their long trip back to Seventh Heaven. There was still something bothering Tifa though.  
  
"So, what did you name that story in the end, Yuffie?", Tifa wondered.  
  
"Oh, lets just say... I'm sure you'll find out soon enough."  
  
"Man, just as long as you don't write about what happened today! I think it's been a day I'd rather forget... What with Aeris dying and all... Ergh!", Cloud shivered.  
  
"You've got no worries there, Cloud!", Yuffie snickered. "This is one part of our lives that people are *never* gonna know about! Heh heh heh!"  
  
THE END___________ 


End file.
